Wednesday, March 4, 2015

Day 3 Success.. #30Layers30Days

How do you define success?  What words and feelings come to mind when you think of it?  What scares you the most about success and how do you (consciously or unconsciously) avoid it?  In your mind, how does courage relate to success?

Success is living a life that you enjoy...whatever that may be.  The words that come to mind are freedom and love.  The scary thing about success is wondering when the tables will turn.  When things get too good I subconsciously think about all that could go wrong.  Ways I avoid it are making excuses for how my success "might" change me as a person or push away those around me.  Courage is directly related because you have to be able to deal with those around you changing as well as the responsibility of remaining successful.  You can't just accomplish things and stop putting forth the effort.

Tuesday, March 3, 2015

All The Many Layers

I'm a blog geek!

I came across another great blog and blogger (@GGReneeWrites) and her posts spoke volumes and some of her words were exactly thoughts that I have had as well as situations I am currently in.  Check out her blog All The Many Layers and get inspired...I will be participating in the 30 day writing challenge #30Layers30Days, as you can see I am 3 days late but I will do all three days in this post.  I will try my hardest to do my post each day...working on discipline and focus!  Other than patience those are the hardest two areas of my life!

Day 1... Here and There : Are you where you always thought you'd be at this point in your life?  How do you feel about the distance between where you are and where you want to be?  How do you find peace in the moment, right where you are, at any given time?

  * In my life now I am actually where I thought I would be at this point...I always had the typical goals of graduate high school, college, get a 9-5 jobs, start a family and live happily ever after!  I'm not married yet but my partner and I are committed to each other 100% and marriage is definitely on its way and we have two amazing boys, I have a job and I've graduated high school and college all by the age of 30...typical right??  But guess what...I am still unfulfilled!  Now that I have the things I always thought would bring pure bliss has prompted me to search for what brings purpose to my life and the feeling of fulfillment.  I love love love being a mom and having a family...I'm in my element when I am doing that but where the lack of fulfillment comes in is having to be away from my children all day and coming home to my man and kids tired as hell working a job that is not the most fulfilling.  Don't get me wrong, we are BLESSED beyond measure but now I want to be in a career where I can control my time more and be with my family more at my best self...The distance between where I am and where I want to be makes me feel anxious because I have worked my whole life for the goals above so now trying to focus on new goals of time control and fulfilling work has me feeling like I'm starting from square one.  The way I find peace is constantly reading self-help books, blogs and watching interviews of those who are where I am trying to be.  That gives me peace knowing a lot of people started exactly where I am and they have changed their circumstances with hard work and DISCIPLINE lol I also have peace knowing that I have a family who supports me and my kids are happy but I myself, want to give them more of me...not the tired and drained mommy and partner who passes out by 9pm :-) I'm sure there are those who can relate.

Day 2 ... Upper Limit: What is the highest level of creativity, responsibility, abundance, influence, accomplishment that you can realistically imagine for yourself?  How high do your dreams go?  What is your highest vision and do you truly, madly, deeply believe that vision can become a reality?

* Realistically...hmmm, I'm getting there.  But I have sooo many creative ideas and goals that I would love to accomplish but where I always draw the line, which I need to stop, is knowing where and how to start and also finding people to help with the visions that I can't achieve by myself.  My dreams go very high which I can admit, is intimidating.  But through my process of a new mindset I'm starting to be able to actually believe these things can be done.  My highest vision is to first and foremost be out of the 9-5 rat race, get paid for writing and photography.  These two interests that I have will allow me to travel with my family as well as have more control over my time.  This will take more discipline and different types of long hours but I will have a lot more freedom.  

My ultimate long term goal is to be a consultant for the transformation of the education system.  The system is very outdated and is failing lots of the youth.  I want to learn as much as I can on the different ways kids learn and how these methods can be incorporated in the schools so no child is "labeled" because they happen to get a teacher who doesn't teach in the way they can learn.  I would like to travel to different states and countries to learn different methods used at successful schools, particularly "Project Based Schools" and bring them to the school districts in all areas where they have low performance and high dropout rates.  Mainly the public schools because not everyone can afford to pay for private education or homeschooling for their children and financing should not determine if you get a good education or not.  I want to basically bridge the gap between schooling and education.  I do believe this vision can become a reality because there are many people who know the schools need revamping and I would be willing to work with those individuals to get the ball rolling.

Day 3 ... Failure: How do you define failure?  What words and feelings come to mind when you think of it? What scares you the most about failure and how do you (consciously or unconsciously) avoid it?  What do you care about enough that you would risk failure, in spite of your fears, just for the experience of pursuing it no matter what happens?

*   Failure is lack of happiness and not living in your purpose.  There can be moments when we are unhappy but being unhappy daily is what I feel is failure.  Fear, depression, embarrassment and avoidance come to mind when I think of failure.  I get scared of failure rubbing off on my kids, I want them to SEE how to live in their purpose and live a fulfilled life, following their true passions.  We can tell a child all day what they can do and should do but they mainly imitate what their role models DO.  I try to avoid failure by striving to be a better me and stay in turned to ME which will lead me where I need to go.  I used to feel failure was not being successful when trying new things but now I have learned that those failures are only lessons to take with you once you get up and keep moving forward.  I used to avoid failure by procrastinating and making excuses and sometimes just not even trying and remaining in my comfort zone.  I care enough about my sanity and my family's daily routines that I would risk failure.  I want us to have the luxury of doing work we actually enjoy, my kids actually learning about LIFE and not regurgitating "facts" that are taught in school.  Being able to truly be themselves not having to conform to be the "image" that will land them a job but being themselves and creating jobs for themselves and others.

Soooo there are my Days 1 -3 for the 30 Days 30 Layers challenge...I hope you all join in!!

Thanks again GG!!!

Wednesday, February 18, 2015

Patience ...Be careful what you ask for

Becoming a patient person is the most challenging but rewarding thing in life!  About 7 years ago I was praying and sincerely asked God to help me be a more patient person.  Boy did that prayer get answered!  I have been tested in EVERY area of my life in dealing with patience and I can definitely say I have seen much progression but I'm not there yet.  I was sooo impatient, I needed things to happen right away!  If it didn't happen in MY timing, I would say well this isn't for me.  In those 7 years I have read countless books on people who inspire me or just self help books in general and it all boils down to patience, thoughts and enjoying the journey.  I am a youtube and interview junkie I read and watch interviews of people in all industries because I need to continuously remind myself that great things in the making take time.  Going through this I have researched and taken interest in soooo many areas that I would have NEVER thought about had I gotten the things that I wished for 7 years ago!  Patience in a way, can guide you to your purpose.  When you don't get what you want right away you continue to try different things that are more fitting for YOU...a lot of times we think we know what we want but once we explore other avenues we see there is so much more to do in life.

I went from just wanting a good job that paid me lots of money doing minimal work to actually wanting a career that is inspiring and helping others.  I would only apply to jobs based on the salary, I didn't care what the job title was and guess what I had NO INTERVIEWS for any of those positions I had applied to.  So I'm like God what is going on...I have a million resumes, cover letters and job applications and in 7 years not ONE has come through.  So it forced me to search deeper to see what God is trying to show me.  I am so much more knowledgeable about life in general and I've noticed my focus has been more on schools and the outdated system that is destroying a lot of our kids.  So I literally obsess over videos and books regarding kids and how they learn and I feel that is an area I'm really interested in. 

But back to the topic at hand, on the constant journey of patience you can learn a lot about yourself and what it is that really motivates you.  Don't get me wrong there are days where I am frustrated to the MAX!  I get down right pissed off!  But I have to keep doing my part and moving forward because like Big Sean said in one of his videos KNOWING that what you ultimately want is coming in the future changes your attitude.  Until you change your mindset, nothing will open up for you. 

"Patience is not simply the ability to wait - It's how we behave while we're waiting " ~ Joyce Meyers

I'm definitely focusing on my behavior during the waiting period, I have been on bad behavior for a while!